Archive

Archive for the ‘Dating debating’ Category

Sure, I’d love to see your farm!

March 25th, 2009
9 comments
I have great news! This weekend I am going to hang out on a farm somewhere in the middle of no-where Utah! Yay me!

The other day ED asked me, over a plate of cheese fries from The Training Table, what my plans for the weekend are and what my homework load was looking like. I told him that I didn’t really have any plans and that homework outlook seemed low, then added suspiciously, “why do you ask?”. Then my darling ED told me that he was going to go to his parents house for the weekend, along with his brother, to do some work on the family farm. Then he oh so casually asked me if I would like to join him… at his parents house… for the weekend! I am happy to report that I did not jump across the table and kiss him, nor did I start hyperventalating from a full blown panic attack. I kept it cool and collected and simply said, “Sure, that sounds like fun.”

Later I got a call from my best friend Karin The Russian (that’s right she started her own blog) to tell her about my conversation. We went over all of the important details, like what the deeper meaning could be, how I felt about things and what the traveling arrangements would be.

We got off the phone, less than 2 minutes later Karina called me back up.

Karina: “I totally forgot to ask you the most important question! What are you going to wear? I think you should wear the new shirt you got from bebe yesterday! You look so sexy in that!”

Me: laughing “Well, I am going to be on a farm, so I don’t think a silk blouse from bebe is the best choice. Plus, I don’t want to appear all uppity fancy-shmancy high maitenence. I was thinking I would just wear jeans and casual tops and my cowboy boots.”

Karina: “So let me get this strait… you won’t wear a bebe shirt, but you are going to wear your DESIGNER cowboy boots? What the hell is wrong with you?”

Me: “Boots are boots! They won’t know the difference. I just can’t wear them out in the mud…come to think of it, that might give me away.”

Karina: “Whatever. OK, here is your To Do list items while you are there. Are you ready? Number one: Wear overalls! Number two: Have sex in a barn!”

Me: “Oh. My. God! You are too funny!”

Karina: “I expect a full report on these two items. Just make sure that you do not have straw stuck in your hair when you go back in the house. But if you do, just hurry and put in your mouth and they will think you are one of them!”

Good old Karina. Always looking out for what is important!

All joking aside, what do you wear to meet the parents? I’m slightly out of practice here folks. In fact, the last parents I met, were my x-husbands. Wow… “but I am So not going to do what everyone thinks I am going to do, which is totally FREAK out!” Sorry, had a Jerry McGuire flashback for a minute there.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating, Posts Grandma won't approve of

Could You Please Just Lie To Me?

March 19th, 2009
3 comments

I’ll be the first to admit, sometimes I fish for complements. It started when I was little girl. My Mother would take my sisters and I shopping for school clothes and when we got back we would force my Dad to sit there while we did a fashion show of all of our new digs. With each new outfit I would ask “Daddy, what do you think of this one?” and being the well trained man that he is (having a wife and 3 daughters did the trick), he would always respond that it was “very nice” or “cute”. If his enthusiasm wasn’t quite what I hoped for I would give him THE LOOK. You know, the look that says Dad this outfit deserves much higher praise and if you don’t recognize that I might just cry, or at the very least pout! To which my Dad would either validate with higher praise or give me a hard time because he is mean like that.

ED has not received proper training. He keeps insisting on this whole honesty thing. “Babe what do you think of this top? Do you think it is too tight or can I pull it off?” Pause… More of a pause… I give him THE LOOK… Still more of a pause! Finally, as I am already yanking it off to find something else, he starts in with “no, I think it’s OK. I’m just trying to thing of what everyone else will be wearing and yes, I think it will be OK.”

I realize that is a very minor example, but he is like that with almost everything. The other day I read a blog post from Wasatch Woman’s Magazine that was talking about honesty and giving opinions and it got me thinking further about this component to my relationship with ED. I have to admit that I really do like dating someone who has an opinion. He is constantly opening my eyes to different points of view and it keeps things interesting. I also know that he will never let me leave the house looking inappropriate, which truth be told is really a good thing. But every now and then, when he doesn’t give me the simple complement I am fishing for, when he over analyzes and complicates things, I look at him and say “could you please just lie to me? Right now I don’t want to hear the truth.”

Is that so wrong?

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating, sometimes I get on a soap box

Baby Steps

March 10th, 2009
5 comments
I’m not very good at relationships, truth be told. I tend to freeze up, close off and sabotage them some how. This is not a confession, this is the truth.

I am not very good at relationships.

When the boyfriend and I started dating, we agreed to take things slow. Real slow. We are both romantics turned realists who have gone through the wringer several times with bad relationships. To say we are jaded or damaged is too cliche (even for me) as I believe that almost everyone who has ever dated ends up with some sort of emotional baggage. The good news is that we know we have personal issues and are still committed to making an effort to overcome our damaged selves.

This is round two for us. Moving forward has been one foot slowly in front of the other. We are using honesty and sometimes forced communication to avoid making not only the same mistakes we made the first time, but also the mistakes we’ve made in other past relationships.

ED and I have been dating for just over 2 months and things have been going really good! I have tried my best not rush things along. A few weeks ago I tried to push him to re-meet my parents, but he wasn’t ready. Once I understood that I backed off, recognizing that he just needed time to do things at his own pace. So you can imagine my surprise when last week he asked me if I wanted to have dinner at his brothers restaurant, and by the way, his brother and wife will be joining us for a drink afterward. I held my enthusiasm and nervousness in. You see, while ED met my family during our first go round, I never met his.

Despite my nervousness, it ended up being a really great night. ED and his brother greeted each other with an enthusiastic “Brother!” It was very amusing for me to watch them interact. Their mannerisms and the way they speak is so similar. I guess my younger sister Staci and I are the same way. We ate amazing wings, shared a few pitchers of beer and watched the March snow fall. Honestly I couldn’t have hoped for a better casual meeting of a beloved family member of his!

ED and I are opposites in so many ways. Sometimes I start to fall into my same horrible self sabotaging ways of closing off and distancing myself, but he catches me doing it before I even realize and calls me out, asks me to communicate and actually listens to what I say, now that’s a first! While it’s not easy to be called out on my childish lack of communication skills when it comes to matters of the heart, it is pretty damn cool to have found someone who is starting to recognize it and cares enough to say something.

We are not running a marathon or even speed walking. It’s baby steps all the way.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating

A first for us

March 9th, 2009
3 comments

One of the down sides to dating a personal trainer is that they work on the weekends. Something about needing to be available when the clients need them or whatever. So ED and I have never had the opportunity to spend a lazy Sunday together. That is, until yesterday and let me tell you, it was awesome! ED canceled his sessions and neither of us had pressing homework or obligations, except to each other. We spent the entire day doing nothing but eating, watching movies, napping and cuddling. The best part was, we actually got along the entire time AND I am not sick of him! Now that’s a first!

I didn’t get my couches cleaned, I didn’t make it snowshoeing, I didn’t touch my homework, I didn’t make it over to my parents for dinner and I didn’t get to see the new Nordstrom. But you know what? I don’t regret it at all. Being lazy totally kicked ass. Plus, there is always next weekend to be productive.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating

I think the flower distracted them

March 3rd, 2009
3 comments

Saturday night was an event that I look forward to all year, The ADDY Award Gala. For those of you not in the advertising industry the ADDYS are awards given to advertising agencies as well as in house agencies for their creative work. The award gala is a formal affair and of course I LOVE formal affairs. Any chance to get all dressed up is one I will take! Of course I had to buy a new outfit (yeah, twist my arm right?). I ended up going with a black fitted knee length pencil skirt and a light pink halter top with a ginormous flower at the top.
Only problem was that I am pasty white. I decided to get my first ever spray on tan, just enough to “give me a glow”. Little did I know how serious spray tanning needs to be taken. I ended up with one arm darker than the other, my right wrist looks dirty and my left wrist looks freckled.

Luckily my dashing date ED chose to make the right decision and pretend like it wasn’t so bad. He’s a smart man. We ended up having a lovely time and ED got exposed to the advertising world that I work in, complete with all of the egos that fuel us. I didn’t take a full length shot, but here are the two that I do have.


Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating, Out and About

I’m dating a freak

February 26th, 2009
8 comments

Text conversation with the boyfriend:

Me: “What do you think about me making you dinner tonight?”

ED: “Sounds good to me.”

Me: “Any requests?”

ED: “Nope. It’s up to you.”

Me: “Well I was thinking I’d skip the gym and go grocery shopping instead as I have no food in my place since the Secret has not delivered it to me yet. Plus then you’d be able to see me in my sexy business clothes. ;) ”

Me: “OR I can go to the gym, pick up Greek food and you will get sweaty, hair in ponytail Summer and I will still not have food at my place.”

ED: I don’t want to hurt your health and fitness so Greek food sounds great. :) ”

Me: “How did I know you would say that? Fine… I’ll go to the gym, but just so you know, I am in a skirt today AND I curled my hair. Neither of which you will see. :-P

ED: “It’s a damn shame, but I care about you and don’t want your health to suffer because I’m selfish. :) Besides, I really like sweaty post workout Summer too. :)

Seriously? Serves me right for dating a personal trainer. I try to get off the hook, with somewhat legitimate reasons, and he doesn’t bite. WTF? I guess should have known better than to try and seducing him with food and business clothes. He has non-human will power.

Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating

This year I don’t hate Valentines Day

February 11th, 2009
6 comments
For the past 3 years I have pretty much dreaded, despised and cursed Valentines day. Being single will do that to you. This year however, I am not single! I am dating a great guy who is a planner with a super romantic side. Everybody now “Awwww!”

I will actually be out of town for Valentines day so the boyfriend and I decided we would celebrate early. We both agreed to get all of our homework done in advance so that we would have no distractions and to spend all day Sunday together.


To start the day off right, the boyfriend made me breakfast. Yes this is my “Goldenrod” ghetto kitchen. I only wish you could see the push button stove better.

After our hearty breakfast of steak, eggs and Ego Waffles we got ready to head up the mountain. Around 10 AM the boyfriend walked into the bathroom to see what was taking so long. “You do realize we are going skiing right?”
Flabergahsted I replied “Don’t you even know me at all?” then turned to put another coat of mascara on.

We made it up to The Canyons around 11ish. The boyfriend turned out to be an excellent skiing buddy (although he is a boarder), and not just because he carried my skis for me from the car to the tram (which was excellent), but because he is so incredibly fun to be around. We ended up having a great time, even though he did have the nerve to throw snowballs at me. The weather was a little snowy but not too cold and we never had to wait in line for longer than a couple minutes.

After skiing we headed back to get cleaned up. The boyfriend made dinner reservations at Log Haven wich was unbelievably good! I had never really been there before. We had a corner table that overlooked the beautiful mountains. The service, the crab cakes, the wine, the steak and lobster – it was all fantastic. I am drooling just thinking about it again. And of course the company completed it all.

I seriously couldn’t have asked for a better (early) Valentines day. This man, the boyfriend, I think I am going to have to keep him around for a while. He is starting to get to me and for once it is not a scary thing.

Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating, Emotions get the best of me, Out and About

Damn cat! Damn Boyfriend!

January 30th, 2009
7 comments
A while ago Karina the Russian and I decided that the one good thing about having an albino retard cat (Bodie), was that we could blame him for everything. House is a mess? Damn cat! No food in the kitchen? Damn cat!! Stub your toe? Damn cat!!! Start your period? Having a bad hair day? DAMN CAT!!! It has been an ongoing joke for a while now, especially over text messages.

“I’ve been running around all day. So tired. No gym. Damn cat!”

“Gonna be late! Damn cat! Be there in 20.”

“OMG! Is this some kind of f’ing joke?? 3rd day I’m turning on the radio and Hoobastank is on AGAIN! F@*%ING CAT!

And my personal favorite, sent from Karina while trying to navigate the Denver airport.

“Did you know Island 3 and Island Street sounds the same to a Russian person?! Damn cat! I already made a few people laugh here!”

So Wednesday night ED came over. We both decided to put homework on hold and just have a quality stress free night together. We watched The Daily Show, The Soup and American Idol (Salt Lake City auditions) while munching on Kettle Corn. We cuddled on the couch, we laughed, we relaxed. It was perfect. To two busy college students, it was a slice of heaven. Before we were going to call it a night I said “Oh no! I didn’t get a new blog post written!” He told me it was OK and that I could blame it on him and just say “No new post. Was distracted. Damn boyfriend!”

Boy is he going to regret saying that! Now that I have his permission, I have already come up with several ways to fully take advantage of it: I have nothing to wear. Damn boyfriend! My apartment is a disaster. Damn boyfriend! I’m late for work again. Damn boyfriend! I’m out of beer, wine AND vodka? DAMN BOYFRIEND!!!

Not quite the same as “Damn cat”… IT’S BETTER!!!

I’m so going to be single forever…

Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating, K to the R stories, Posts Grandma won't approve of

Going Green

January 27th, 2009
8 comments
I’m changing my stance. Environmental dating, on the rare occasion, is not such a bad thing. In fact, I am quite pleased with the results. Don’t worry, I’m not going to get all sappy about liking a guy… I have Karina to do that for me.

Karina: So how are things going with you and ED? What did you guys do the other night?

Me: I like him! He is pretty freaking adorable. He came over and we had a study date… where we actually studied! I didn’t realize that was possible! He was all studying at the table and I was all at my desk, then we would take a break to kiss for a second, then study some more.

Karina: OH! MY! GOD! You guys are like the hottest sexiest nerdiest couple EVER! That is so freaking cute! Oh honey! Wait… is he like your boyfriend now?

Me: Um…

Karina: He totally is! That is so cute! Honey I am so happy for you!

What can I say? He gets me. I get him. He gives me a case of the butterflies and makes me smile that big goofy smile when I see a text or get a call from him.

I can’t believe I am actually posting a picture of us. It will probably be the kiss of death. Don’t be surprised next week when I post the breakup post. I’m jinxing myself… but look how cute and happy we are are! How can I resist sharing him with the internet?

Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating, K to the R stories

Whoever said beauty is pain, should be shot!

January 20th, 2009
5 comments
I’ll come right out and say it before anyone has a chance to. I am a hypocrite. I go and write this whole blog post about the dangers of “Environmental Dating” then I go and do exactly what I am not supposed to do.

I met ED (like that? ED? Short for Environmental dating? Yeah, I’m pretty clever like that.) about 1.5 years ago and things didn’t work out due to timing or not being at the same place in our lives or some cliche lines like that. Well, we reconnected via facebook and have been hanging out for a little while. He is cute. I like him. That’s about as far into the mushy stuff as I am capable of going. Anyway, ED is a personal trainer as well as a full time student studying to be a Physical Therapist.

So Saturday I am sitting on my butt eating Carmel Hershey Kisses getting caught up on my Tivo when I get the bright idea that ED could help motivate me to get back into shape. I text him asking if he would be willing to train me, which luckily he was. We set up a time on Sunday to work out at my gym. He gets me to commit to the days I will work out as well as my time commitment. I say 3 days a week for an hour and a half. Little did I know that an hour and a half meant 45 minutes of cardio and 45 minutes of guy style weight training.

We met up Sunday, I did my cardio before he got there. 35 minutes of walking wasn’t exactly what he had in mind, but he didn’t push the matter. Instead he decided to punish me by making me stick out my butt as I did squats (form my ass!), lift really heavy stuff a whole bunch of times and die of embarrassment at not being able to do a pull up or a dip thingy – even on the assisted machines! To finish things off, ED helped me stretch which was the most painful feeling of release I have ever experience.

By the time we left the gym my legs were jello. I laughed it off trying to be tough and cute at the same time while cursing him under my breath, knowing full well that the stiffness I felt then would be nothing compared to the following days.

I text ED the next morning requesting he meet me at my work to carry me up the stairs to my office. He didn’t show. Obviously he is not as committed to a second chance relationship as I thought he was. Maybe Karina is right that there should be no second chance, then again, maybe I just need to buck up and not let myself get so damn out of shape! Either way, I can barely move right now and I am perfectly fine with letting ED take all the blame.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Bag full of complaints, Dating debating