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Concessions are a gift

May 19th, 2009

Me: “So you know that bruise I thought I got from sitting on the rock at Emerald Pool in Zion? The one on the side of my knee? Well, turns out it really is a bug bite of some sort cause it is all swollen and itches like a son-of-bitch.”

ED: “Oh, you mean the one I said was a bug bite all along? Man, I really hate being right ALL the time.”

Me: “Yes. That is the one. I debated telling you for that very reason. Consider my ‘you were right’ as an early birthday present.”

ED: “Aw. Thanks baby.”

Relationships are all about the give and take. Lucky for ED I’m such a giver in this one.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating, Hiking

It’s Not the Same Thing

April 13th, 2009

I convinced ED to come with me over to my sisters house on Friday night to keep me company while she did my hair (what can I say? Tuition is due and she does a fab job for cheap!). I did my best to explain to him that it would be fun. He could laugh at how silly I look, have a drink or two, we’ll listen to music and gossip – a great time will be had by all!

Friday night comes around and ED picks me up. We are getting a bite to eat before heading over and he says, “You know, everyone agrees with me that it is kind of bull that I am coming over with you tonight.”
“Everyone? You took a pole? With all of the guys at the gym? Of course they are going to say that!”
“No, the girls there agreed too! Listen, it’s like if I invited you over to my buddies house to watch me play video games.”
“So not the same thing! First of all, IF I were ever stupid enough to get myself into your hypothetical situation, which I would not, I know I would be flat out ignored whereas you, my darling, will be fully engaged into our conversation.”
“Lucky me…”
ED ended up coming with me and in-spite of his complaining, he had a good time. He politely excused himself mid-way into our girl talk of concerts, embarrassing moments and reality TV shows, to watch The Best of Will Farell DVD with my sisters boyfriend. He did manage to snap a photo of us though.
See? Don’t we look like we are having fun?
I suppose that men and women are just different. We enjoy good conversation and taking care of ourselves while men enjoy… um… Will Farell?
Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating

Wesley

April 2nd, 2009

Me: Hey babe, did you get a chance to read my post about going to the country?

ED: Yeah, I liked it.

Me: Oh sweetie! You are getting so good at giving the standard boyfriend answer instead of telling me what you really think! Have you been practicing?

ED (ignoring my comment): You were right about the comments. It’s pretty sweet that the Kel person called me hot and she made me laugh when she said she wouldn’t call me ED.

Me: Yeah, but unfortunately you are stuck with it now. You are ED!

ED: What if you called me Wesley?

Me: Wesley? Why would I call you Wesley?

ED: You know, “farm boy, fetch me that pail of water.” “As you wish.”

Me: Great Princess Bride reference babe and that would be appropriate… but I’m sorry, I named you ED and ED you will stay. We are past the point of no return.

ED: OK, but just remember, people thinking I have an erectile dysfunction or that I’m emotionally disturbed reflects poorly on you too!

Me: Noted. I’m still not changing your name.

ED: It was worth a try.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating

There’s no crying in the country

March 31st, 2009

So last week I told you that I was going to the country to meet my boyfriend ED’s parents and see the farm he grew up on. I asked for your opinions as to what to wear and you did not disappoint! Your advise was spot on! I know this because I didn’t listen and wish I would have. Ah well! I always did have to learn my lessons the hard way.

Designer boots or no designer boots? That was my original question. You convinced me not to take them and I decided to bring my hiking boots instead. Well, I decided to, but I actually forgot to put them in my bag so I showed up bringing only the lightweight tennis shoes I had on. Doh! Strike one for the city girl!

Let’s see, what other advise didn’t I listen to? Oh, the whole get up early part. I half way listened. I got up about on time, jumped through the shower, did my hair and put on some light makeup. Little did I know that the day they had in store for me was one of manual labor. Luckily ED’s mother, let’s call her Mama ED, was kind enough to tell me to leave my fancy purse in the room (so I don’t get mud on it) and handed me a pair of leather work gloves and some sunscreen.

First chore – dig a ditch with a tractor.
Second chore – get tractor unstuck from the mud.
Third chore – dig ditch by hand.


Mostly I was on supervision duty along with stacking random pieces of wood from dead trees in the burn pile (score one for me not having appropriate shoes!). Luckily I had the guidance of ED’s 5 year old nephew to show me the ropes.

Fourth chore – set the field on fire.


After watching the field burn and pretending not to have anxiety about fire containment and whether or not the reported the fires to the proper fire burning officials, we stopped for lunch.

Although I was ready for a nap, I sucked it up and found a way to redeem myself by 1) learning to drive a tractor and 2) hauling tree branches that ED and his brother were chainsawing, onto the trailer bed and then onto another burn pile.

This post is getting quite long and there is probably no need to tell you EVERY detail so I’ll try and wrap things up.

Day two – the wind was incredibly strong so they decided that the days chores would be to cut down a tree that had fallen in front of their grandfathers farm “just across the way”. That’s right, because wind and sawdust go perfectly together. However, lifting heavy tree stumps was totally worth seeing the way ED can swing an axe. I literally had to tell myself to stop eye-raping him before someone noticed.

Joking and eye-raping aside, I had a great time. ED’s family is amazing. I finally understand where he gets his incredible work ethic. I am sore, bruised and exhausted. I got to see so much. Like regular horses, baby horses, all sorts of bunny rabbits (I even held one, but not the one with the red eyes because it looked evil…like it would chew your head off if you gave it the chance), chickens with feather shoes on and a crap load of farm cats and dogs. When I asked ED what the bunnies names and the chickens names were he told me that “not all farm animals get names.” I told him that on my farm, ALL animals would be named – even the chickens. Granted their names would probably be Shut-the-hell-up-noisy-ass-bird 1, 2, 3, etc.

Farm life is great but I’m glad to be home.

The end.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

P.S. Do I label this post as a vacation? That just seems not-quite right.

Dating debating, Vacations

Sure, I’d love to see your farm!

March 25th, 2009
I have great news! This weekend I am going to hang out on a farm somewhere in the middle of no-where Utah! Yay me!

The other day ED asked me, over a plate of cheese fries from The Training Table, what my plans for the weekend are and what my homework load was looking like. I told him that I didn’t really have any plans and that homework outlook seemed low, then added suspiciously, “why do you ask?”. Then my darling ED told me that he was going to go to his parents house for the weekend, along with his brother, to do some work on the family farm. Then he oh so casually asked me if I would like to join him… at his parents house… for the weekend! I am happy to report that I did not jump across the table and kiss him, nor did I start hyperventalating from a full blown panic attack. I kept it cool and collected and simply said, “Sure, that sounds like fun.”

Later I got a call from my best friend Karin The Russian (that’s right she started her own blog) to tell her about my conversation. We went over all of the important details, like what the deeper meaning could be, how I felt about things and what the traveling arrangements would be.

We got off the phone, less than 2 minutes later Karina called me back up.

Karina: “I totally forgot to ask you the most important question! What are you going to wear? I think you should wear the new shirt you got from bebe yesterday! You look so sexy in that!”

Me: laughing “Well, I am going to be on a farm, so I don’t think a silk blouse from bebe is the best choice. Plus, I don’t want to appear all uppity fancy-shmancy high maitenence. I was thinking I would just wear jeans and casual tops and my cowboy boots.”

Karina: “So let me get this strait… you won’t wear a bebe shirt, but you are going to wear your DESIGNER cowboy boots? What the hell is wrong with you?”

Me: “Boots are boots! They won’t know the difference. I just can’t wear them out in the mud…come to think of it, that might give me away.”

Karina: “Whatever. OK, here is your To Do list items while you are there. Are you ready? Number one: Wear overalls! Number two: Have sex in a barn!”

Me: “Oh. My. God! You are too funny!”

Karina: “I expect a full report on these two items. Just make sure that you do not have straw stuck in your hair when you go back in the house. But if you do, just hurry and put in your mouth and they will think you are one of them!”

Good old Karina. Always looking out for what is important!

All joking aside, what do you wear to meet the parents? I’m slightly out of practice here folks. In fact, the last parents I met, were my x-husbands. Wow… “but I am So not going to do what everyone thinks I am going to do, which is totally FREAK out!” Sorry, had a Jerry McGuire flashback for a minute there.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating, Posts Grandma won't approve of

Could You Please Just Lie To Me?

March 19th, 2009

I’ll be the first to admit, sometimes I fish for complements. It started when I was little girl. My Mother would take my sisters and I shopping for school clothes and when we got back we would force my Dad to sit there while we did a fashion show of all of our new digs. With each new outfit I would ask “Daddy, what do you think of this one?” and being the well trained man that he is (having a wife and 3 daughters did the trick), he would always respond that it was “very nice” or “cute”. If his enthusiasm wasn’t quite what I hoped for I would give him THE LOOK. You know, the look that says Dad this outfit deserves much higher praise and if you don’t recognize that I might just cry, or at the very least pout! To which my Dad would either validate with higher praise or give me a hard time because he is mean like that.

ED has not received proper training. He keeps insisting on this whole honesty thing. “Babe what do you think of this top? Do you think it is too tight or can I pull it off?” Pause… More of a pause… I give him THE LOOK… Still more of a pause! Finally, as I am already yanking it off to find something else, he starts in with “no, I think it’s OK. I’m just trying to thing of what everyone else will be wearing and yes, I think it will be OK.”

I realize that is a very minor example, but he is like that with almost everything. The other day I read a blog post from Wasatch Woman’s Magazine that was talking about honesty and giving opinions and it got me thinking further about this component to my relationship with ED. I have to admit that I really do like dating someone who has an opinion. He is constantly opening my eyes to different points of view and it keeps things interesting. I also know that he will never let me leave the house looking inappropriate, which truth be told is really a good thing. But every now and then, when he doesn’t give me the simple complement I am fishing for, when he over analyzes and complicates things, I look at him and say “could you please just lie to me? Right now I don’t want to hear the truth.”

Is that so wrong?

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating, sometimes I get on a soap box

Baby Steps

March 10th, 2009
I’m not very good at relationships, truth be told. I tend to freeze up, close off and sabotage them some how. This is not a confession, this is the truth.

I am not very good at relationships.

When the boyfriend and I started dating, we agreed to take things slow. Real slow. We are both romantics turned realists who have gone through the wringer several times with bad relationships. To say we are jaded or damaged is too cliche (even for me) as I believe that almost everyone who has ever dated ends up with some sort of emotional baggage. The good news is that we know we have personal issues and are still committed to making an effort to overcome our damaged selves.

This is round two for us. Moving forward has been one foot slowly in front of the other. We are using honesty and sometimes forced communication to avoid making not only the same mistakes we made the first time, but also the mistakes we’ve made in other past relationships.

ED and I have been dating for just over 2 months and things have been going really good! I have tried my best not rush things along. A few weeks ago I tried to push him to re-meet my parents, but he wasn’t ready. Once I understood that I backed off, recognizing that he just needed time to do things at his own pace. So you can imagine my surprise when last week he asked me if I wanted to have dinner at his brothers restaurant, and by the way, his brother and wife will be joining us for a drink afterward. I held my enthusiasm and nervousness in. You see, while ED met my family during our first go round, I never met his.

Despite my nervousness, it ended up being a really great night. ED and his brother greeted each other with an enthusiastic “Brother!” It was very amusing for me to watch them interact. Their mannerisms and the way they speak is so similar. I guess my younger sister Staci and I are the same way. We ate amazing wings, shared a few pitchers of beer and watched the March snow fall. Honestly I couldn’t have hoped for a better casual meeting of a beloved family member of his!

ED and I are opposites in so many ways. Sometimes I start to fall into my same horrible self sabotaging ways of closing off and distancing myself, but he catches me doing it before I even realize and calls me out, asks me to communicate and actually listens to what I say, now that’s a first! While it’s not easy to be called out on my childish lack of communication skills when it comes to matters of the heart, it is pretty damn cool to have found someone who is starting to recognize it and cares enough to say something.

We are not running a marathon or even speed walking. It’s baby steps all the way.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating

A first for us

March 9th, 2009

One of the down sides to dating a personal trainer is that they work on the weekends. Something about needing to be available when the clients need them or whatever. So ED and I have never had the opportunity to spend a lazy Sunday together. That is, until yesterday and let me tell you, it was awesome! ED canceled his sessions and neither of us had pressing homework or obligations, except to each other. We spent the entire day doing nothing but eating, watching movies, napping and cuddling. The best part was, we actually got along the entire time AND I am not sick of him! Now that’s a first!

I didn’t get my couches cleaned, I didn’t make it snowshoeing, I didn’t touch my homework, I didn’t make it over to my parents for dinner and I didn’t get to see the new Nordstrom. But you know what? I don’t regret it at all. Being lazy totally kicked ass. Plus, there is always next weekend to be productive.

Blogfully yours,

Summer

Dating debating

I think the flower distracted them

March 3rd, 2009

Saturday night was an event that I look forward to all year, The ADDY Award Gala. For those of you not in the advertising industry the ADDYS are awards given to advertising agencies as well as in house agencies for their creative work. The award gala is a formal affair and of course I LOVE formal affairs. Any chance to get all dressed up is one I will take! Of course I had to buy a new outfit (yeah, twist my arm right?). I ended up going with a black fitted knee length pencil skirt and a light pink halter top with a ginormous flower at the top.
Only problem was that I am pasty white. I decided to get my first ever spray on tan, just enough to “give me a glow”. Little did I know how serious spray tanning needs to be taken. I ended up with one arm darker than the other, my right wrist looks dirty and my left wrist looks freckled.

Luckily my dashing date ED chose to make the right decision and pretend like it wasn’t so bad. He’s a smart man. We ended up having a lovely time and ED got exposed to the advertising world that I work in, complete with all of the egos that fuel us. I didn’t take a full length shot, but here are the two that I do have.


Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating, Out and About

I’m dating a freak

February 26th, 2009

Text conversation with the boyfriend:

Me: “What do you think about me making you dinner tonight?”

ED: “Sounds good to me.”

Me: “Any requests?”

ED: “Nope. It’s up to you.”

Me: “Well I was thinking I’d skip the gym and go grocery shopping instead as I have no food in my place since the Secret has not delivered it to me yet. Plus then you’d be able to see me in my sexy business clothes. ;)

Me: “OR I can go to the gym, pick up Greek food and you will get sweaty, hair in ponytail Summer and I will still not have food at my place.”

ED: I don’t want to hurt your health and fitness so Greek food sounds great. :)

Me: “How did I know you would say that? Fine… I’ll go to the gym, but just so you know, I am in a skirt today AND I curled my hair. Neither of which you will see. :-P

ED: “It’s a damn shame, but I care about you and don’t want your health to suffer because I’m selfish. :) Besides, I really like sweaty post workout Summer too. :)

Seriously? Serves me right for dating a personal trainer. I try to get off the hook, with somewhat legitimate reasons, and he doesn’t bite. WTF? I guess should have known better than to try and seducing him with food and business clothes. He has non-human will power.

Blogfully yours,
Summer

Dating debating